This has been one of the most exhausting semesters that I have encountered. I have taken lots of commitments way beyond my threshold. Well, its a goodway to avoid thinking about other things when they are already getting way out of control. I know that such measures are not the right choices, but I can't help it. Things just got way out of hand and I don't know how I'm going to handle them. I just want to go. Run from it. I don't want to face it. Because Im so terrified of what might happen, of what I might lose. Even though I think I've already lost a lot. I don't want to think anymore. It's robbing me of my time that I could use in other things. I can't concentrate. I can't concentrate. I can't study. I would like to blame the person responsible though I was the one that started and did this to myself.
What have I done!? I just cared. I didn't expect to get too emotionally involved. As a matter of fact I was keeping my distance. I was afraid, terrified, mortified of what might happen. Even though I was... no... ,not was but still, enjoying every thing that happened. Every moment that passed and passes never gets forgotten. I would like to forget though I know I never will. Because I saw something different. Something unique that still makes me want to hold on even though "my friends keep telling me that if I really lover I've gotta set her free." Baduy!? Oh well.
I just don't know what to do. I've thought about every situation that I can think of, and I always arrive in a conclusion and solution that I know i'm not capable of. I need to change. I really need to change just to fix this. I like her so much. Please... I already know that I don't deserve a person such as her. I even feel that Im not fit to be near her. My feet trembled when I talked to her. My voice shivered at each statement I let out. My pulse raced when she held my hand. Everything just felt different, something I never expected. But such things would take too long to tell.
